Dying Daily—Meditations for Mortals
The idea comes from Seneca: we die a little each day, and the awareness of that fact is the beginning. Dying Daily is a series of short meditations for mortals—on what to attend to, how to live deliberately, and how to remember to live.
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When Reading Becomes Distraction
Dying Daily—Meditations for Mortals
It’s comforting to find another book about a change we already understand we must make. The book gives the change a little more shape. We underline a passage, we recognize ourselves, and we feel something like movement.
Yet oddly enough, no conversation starts. And the habit is still there.
Understanding takes time to develop, and some decisions require more knowledge than we have. In some cases, we have become good at preparing for a step we are not willing to take.
Thomas à Kempis in The Imitation of Christ gives a religious form to this difficulty:
“I would rather feel contrition than be skilled in defining it.”
Contrition is sorrow for wrongdoing. For Thomas, it belongs to a Christian life of humility and love directed toward God. A correct definition of repentance leaves the wrong untouched. Interestingly, sorrow that is real begins to change what we do.
Epictetus makes a related demand. He asks students to show what they have learned in how they eat and act, not in how they talk about eating and acting. A philosophical discussion can prepare us for conduct. It can also give us an audience before whom we appear further along than we are.
Consider a habit that someone you live with has asked you to change: the phone at dinner, the late nights at work, the sharpness that arrives when you are tired. You have probably read a good deal about it. More reading would help if you did not yet understand the harm.
But you understand enough.
What you lack is the willingness to give up a flattering picture of yourself as someone who is working on it. Knowledge has a limit no further reading removes: it cannot take the step for us.
Acting before we understand can compound a mistake. Waiting until we understand everything protects us from ever risking an action. We need enough knowledge for the next responsible step, and a willingness to revise as the situation becomes clearer.
The change need not be complete to be real. It can begin with one evening, noticed by the person who asked. That evening will teach you something no amount of solitary reading could.
The same is true of meditations like this one.
They can become another way to prepare for beginning. This one has done its work if it brings you to the point where you close the page and discover what its insight asks of the day.
Daily practice
Think of a passage you have underlined more than once. What change has it been asking of you? If the next step is already clear, put the book down and take it today. Tomorrow you can decide whether you need to read further.
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Thank you for reading; I hope you found something useful.
Until next time, remember to live.
J.W.
P.S. If you found today’s meditation helpful, please consider sharing it.