💀 Dying Every Day
The Dying Every Day series delivers guided meditations on the art of living. Each meditation provides a quote, a selected passage (from an original Stoic text), and a reflection prompt to consider. These meditations are designed to help you (and me) reflect on what it means to live a good life.
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The Perils of Comparison
“Envy is at once a vice and a source of misery. We should treat it as the enemy of our happiness and stifle it like an evil thought. This is Seneca's advice; as he puts it, we shall be pleased with what we have if we avoid the self-torture of comparing our own lot with some other and happier one.”
— Schopenhauer, Our Relation to Ourselves
Selected Passage
In this week’s meditation, we explore the perils of comparison through a selected reading from the letters of Seneca.
One must grow accustomed to slender fare because many problems of time and place will cross the path even of the rich man and one equipped for pleasure and bring him up with a round turn. To have whatsoever he wishes is in no man’s power; it is in his power not to wish for what he has not but cheerfully to employ what comes to him. …
We fail to realize how many things are unnecessary until they begin to be wanting; we merely use them not because we need them but because we have them. And how much do we acquire simply because our neighbors have acquired such things or because most men possess them? Many of our troubles may be explained by the fact that we live according to a pattern and, instead of arranging our lives according to reason, are led astray by convention.
There are things which, if done by the few, we should refuse to imitate; yet when the majority have begun to do them, we follow along—just as if anything were more honorable because it is more frequent!
+ Adapted from On the Conflict Between Pleasure and Virtue
Contemplation Exercise
Consider reflecting on a few of your recent wants or desires. Take a few moments to explore them—ask yourself, “Where do these desires come from?”
It’s fascinating (and humbling) to consider that our desires are not always our own. The French historian and philosopher Rene Girard discovered a similar idea as the Stoics, which he called mimetic desire. Girard believed that we don’t know what to desire and, therefore, turn to others to make up our minds. We learn through imitation to desire the same things as others.
Reflecting on what it means to live a good life involves thinking for ourselves, at least to the best of our abilities. As Seneca stressed in his letter to Lucilius, we should “refuse to imitate” and question and explore our desires.
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Thank you for reading; I hope you found something useful.
Until next time, be wise and be well,
J.W.
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